Quote:
Blar: Greetlings
Big J: Hey man, break out the water!
Big J: I've got a great trick!
Blar: Let's see it
Big J: Well, first of all you get a jug of water... and then, it'll disappear down my coat and behold! Its now a jug of wine!
Blar: Ah, I see
Blar: What's the magic behind this trick?
Big J: I've got another one for walking on water.
Big J: Oh just simple sleight of hand and special effects, not that hard
Blar: Do you have condensed wine powder in your pocket or something?
Big J: Hidden jug of wine in my coat
Blar: Simple but clever
Big J: Indeed, 2,000 years ago I tried that trick, they're still talking about it
Blar: Do you ever do those tricks where people think you're dead but you come out alive after a while?
Big J: Easy to do, all it requires is some paint, a helicopter, and somes skills with puppets
Blar: Won't the audience notice the helicopter?
Blar: How long could you fake a death if you died, say, on a cross?
Big J: Nah, they're too amazed by my resurrection
Big J: Well the trick is, not to actually be on the cross, and get a stunt double to do that bit
Blar: Will the stunt survive?
Big J: Well, if he doesn't, it saves on the helicopters and puppets.
Blar: Hm, true
Blar: Do you make big money with your tricks?
Big J: Oh yeah, I've got followers who pick their wallets while I do it.
Blar: Neat
Blar: How's your fanbase?
Big J: Plus this girl called Mary loves my stuff, she keeps me in money for sure - oh divided.
Big J: People still talk about my tricks 2,000 years ago, which is impressive.
Blar: That sounds pretty amazing
Blar: It's as if you've become a religion to them
Big J: Some get a bit too excited, though. Not sure I like the idea of fights being fought in my name
Big J: Yeah, I know, weird, all I am is a humble conman.
Blar: Yeah
Blar: Do you have any competitors?
Big J: This bloke called Mohammed is giving me trouble.
Blar: Oh, yeah, I've heard of him
Big J: And another guy called Buddha, he's pretty cool though, we hang out at the pub sometimes.
Blar: That's nice
Big J: Yeah, my real secret though is my dad, he's the best.
Blar: He's backing you good, huh?
Big J: A bit overbearing, I mean its like he sees everything, but he's a loving guy
Blar: Yeah
Blar: How about your mother?
Big J: Ahh, yeah, mums nice, shes a little quiet.
Blar: Oh, ok
Big J: And dad is calling me, sorry! A friend called Paul is bugging him about the state of the world again!
Big J: Bye! Peace out!
I love pretending to be Jesus. Next time I'm going as Stalin.
